Brides of Destruction – Here Come the Brides

I had most of this review mentally written even before I had heard the album. The introduction was going to state that Brides of Destruction is the new group featuring Nikki Sixx (Motley Crue) and Tracii Guns (L.A. Guns). The review would then go on to compare Here Come The Brides to previous Motley Crue and L.A. Guns albums. Finally, it was going to talk about how much I love 80’s metal and how awesome the new Brides of Destruction album was.

Unfortunately, the review didn’t turn out that way. I had hoped that the collaboration between Sixx and Guns would bring out the heavier side of both musicians. Instead, both seem content in writing and releasing nine tracks of poppy rock. That doesn’t make it bad, but it wasn’t what I had hoped for.

Musically, the album goes out of its way not to break new ground. Most of these songs would have a hard time finding a home on any hard rock radio station, and a couple could jump right to the adult contemporary stations.There are a couple of rockin’ songs, but more often than not I found myself skipping around and looking for something heavy, catchy, or even likable.

While Tracii Guns’ solos shine on tracks like “2x Dead”, his talent doesn’t flow over into the main riffs. Likewise, Sixx’s basswork is decent as expected, but the lyrics are at times embarassingly bad. In “I Don’t Care”, the band begs, “I don’t care/What I got to do to love you/I don’t need/I need you to love me too.” In “Natural Born Killer”, the chorus is filled with a bunch of “Nah Nah Nah”‘s and enough “Heys” to make Rob Zombie jealous. “Life” is a hopelessly generic song about not wasting your life. “”This is life/Once again/It’s been knockin’ at your door/You outta let it in/Don’t waste it/It’s time you face it.” The lyrics read like something I would have thought was cool in sixth grade … which, when I come to think of it, would have been when I was listening to Shout at the Devil.

Part of the problem for me was that vocalist London Le Grand’s never seemed to sell any of the songs. The guy sings, but seems devoid of any personality. He sounds like a million other singers.

Don’t be fooled by the cover of Here Come The Brides — there’s nothing here heavy enough for Headbanger’s Ball. While technically the album is sound, it lacks bite. I had hoped for Shout at the Devil and got Theater of Pain. Tracii Guns has a few moments of brilliance (particularly in the solos on “Revolution” and “Only Get So Far”) and Nikki Sixx puts together a few catchy chord changes here and there, but strip the famous names from the album and you’d have to change the band’s name from Brides of Destruction to Bargain Bin Widows.

01. Shut The Fuck Up
02. I Don’t Care
03. I Got A Gun
04. 2 Times Dead
05. Brace Yourself
06. Natural Born Killer
07. Life
08. Revolution
09. Only Get So Far

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